A digital art image of a wooden heart with a single, glowing blue fern growing from it, set against a blurred city background, symbolizing internal growth.
I will always remember the opening of a large undertaking a few years ago. My email kept me riveted, living off the “Congrats!”. Slack messages, awaiting that large, out-in-front-of-the-whole-organisation pronouncement of my boss.
And at last it arrived in the general conference. I grinned, my face flushed and… that was all. The peak took approximately 10 minutes.
The next day, I was just tired. And now, I’m already hungry for the next win.
There is the trap of the high-achiever, is it? We have been conditioned that success is an act. It is the title on LinkedIn, the holiday posts on Instagram, and the fame.
We are on a hamster wheel, we are chasing a sugar rush of approval, which will never last.
I have recently become purposefully getting out of that wheel. I am adopting a new lifestyle, which I refer to as Low-Profile Living.
It has nothing to do with playing small, losing ambition or compromising your standards. It’s the exact opposite. It is a conscious lifestyle that appreciates simplicity, humility, and emotional sanity more than acknowledgement and extravagance.
It is all about living discreetly and not feeling a need to be able to show someone your success.
Quit Pursuing Accolades, Start Creating the Stage.
My greatest change was the one to internal satisfaction, compared to the outer validation.
And in case you are always after applause, you allow the audience to write your script. You begin to make decisions on what will appear good and not what is right. You are acting in front of people rather than living in your own world.
Being a low-profile life implies that you are your own main audience. It is up to you to impress.
It is a question of creating a life that is not only good but also one that looks good.
This is terrifying at first. Nobody ever applauds when you finally eliminate your credit card bill, or read a tough book, or get to sleep rather than network.
And the impression of profound silent self-respect you receive? That’s not a 10-minute high. That’s durable.
The Practice Perks of “Quiet Thriving”.
This is not merely a kind of abstract, feel-good philosophy. It is extremely pragmatic, practical, and useful particularly for your jobs and health.
When you quit acting, you receive:
- Greater Concentration: Once you are not attempting to record all the victories on social media, you are able to concentrate on work. Your finest, inmost, is done in the background, not the limelight.
- Authentic Relations: You no longer perceive people as a source of networking or a ladder. You begin to develop actual relationships. You have dialogues, not deals.
- Emotional Resilience: You are not going to be judged on the stock exchange of popular opinion. One poor review, a project that is not buzzed, a colleague facing the public who has got a promotion… all of that is not going to destroy you. Your foundation is solid.
- More Energy: It is about to be exhausting on the part of a performer of success. Living an ordinary life, at your own pace, is a sustainable life. You get to retain all those energies you were spending on optics and invest it in yourself.
How to Begin Living a Low-Profile Life.
It is not a question of disabling all your social media and going to a cabin (though you can!). It involves little but steady changes in the value you put your money on.
- Hail Your Unseen Victories. Did you at last get that disorganized file system in order? Have you not been rude to a colleague? Did you stick to your budget? Acknowledge it for yourself. Perhaps, even in writing say in a journal. That’s your new scoreboard.
- Go on a “Praise Fast.” This one is powerful. Attempt to accomplish one thing, be it big or small, and say nothing. Not your girlfriend, not your manager (unless he or she must), not Twitter. Simply sit and have the inner, silent contentment of having accomplished something. See how it feels.
- Find a “Secret” Hobby. Do something that you are not good at and have no plans of ever earning any money or being publicly good at that. Something just for you. In my case, it is the attempt (and failure) to learn to play the ukulele. It is humiliating, funny and 100 percent of mine.
I have never had such a product launch when I needed praise badly.
Only a week ago, I completed a very complicated work. Several days of laborious, exasperating, head-down work were required. I dropped it in the mail and shut my laptop and proceeded to prepare dinner.
I didn’t check for a reply. I didn’t wait for a “Congrats!” message. I simply got that still solid click of a job done.
It was that sensation, I knew, which entirely, satisfactorily belonged to me.
What is one of your recent examples of an invisible win that you are proud of? I would like to know about it in the comments.
-thirah